A Quick Guide to Gaining Confidence When You Socialize

I’m a shy person by nature, not a natural extrovert and definitely not comfortable in large groups of people. So if you’re like me at all, then this guide is for you.

A Quick Guide to Gaining Confidence When You Socialize

I’ve had to learn to be more confident in social situations, and it hasn’t exactly been easy.

But some things I’ve learned how to do over the years:

  1. Introduce myself to new people and quickly find common ground.
  2. Be semi-comfortable in a party where I don’t know most of the people.
  3. Be myself, or some version of that, rather than trying to impress people.
  4. Speak in front of a crowd of strangers (not comfortably, but I do OK).
  5. Talk comfortably one-on-one or in a small group, and not worry too much about whether people will like me.
  6. Make fairly authentic friendships with just a handful of deeper conversations.

I won’t be able to teach you how I did all of that in one article, as it took me years to develop these skills, but today I’d like to share some things that might help you become more confident, and then to practice more. (more…)

Failure Is An Important Part of Entrepreneurship

Many people fail to take action because they’re afraid to fail. Successful people, on the other hand, realize that failure is an important part of the learning process. They know that failure is just a way we learn by trial and error.

Not only do we need to stop being so afraid of failure but we also need to be willing to fail—even eager to fail. I call this kind of instructive failure “failing forward.”

Simply get started, make mistakes, listen to the feedback, correct, and keep moving forward toward the goal.

Every experience will yield more useful information that you can apply the next time.

Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life — STARTING TODAY! –

This isn’t a trick question.

Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life — STARTING TODAY! -

Certainly you know the answer to the question: Who is the person who has been responsible for the life you live right now? YOU!

Everything about you is a result of your doing or not doing… Your income. Debt. Relationships. Health. Fitness level. Attitudes and behaviors.

I’ve often said that you are either creating or allowing everything that is happening in your life.

I think everyone knows this in their hearts, but often times people convince themselves into thinking that external factors are the source of their failure, disappointment, and unhappiness.

External factors do not determine how you live. YOU are in complete control of the quality of your life, by either creating or allowing the circumstances you experience.

When I hear people complain about the state of their life (be it their problems with personal finances, weight, their jobs, or general dissatisfaction), I like to help them see things differently.

If they feel “stuck” and unable to move forward for whatever reason, I ask them to scrutinize both what is working well and what isn’t working well in their life and see how they’ve arrived at where they currently are.

For example, if a woman tells me she’s unhappy with her weight—she travels frequently, and has no to time to exercise or seek healthy foods—I point out that her weight is not a result of her travels and schedule. It’s an outcome of what she chooses to eat and how she chooses to move, regardless of her daily agenda. Why not make a conscious effort to pre-plan healthy meals and snacks, even if it’s on the go, and sneak in 10 minutes here and 10 minutes there to be physically active (hey, I know some frequent flyers who make it a habit of running through airports!).

If you’re frustrated with any area in your life, then it’s time to take a little inventory. (more…)

How to Discover Your Life Purpose in About 20 Minutes

How do you discover your real purpose in life? I’m not talking about your job, your daily responsibilities, or even your long-term goals. I mean the real reason why you’re here at all — the very reason you exist.

How to Discover Your Life Purpose in About 20 Minutes

Perhaps you’re a rather nihilistic person who doesn’t believe you have a purpose and that life has no meaning. Doesn’t matter. Not believing that you have a purpose won’t prevent you from discovering it, just as a lack of belief in gravity won’t prevent you from tripping. All that a lack of belief will do is make it take longer, so if you’re one of those people, just change the number 20 in the title of this blog entry to 40 (or 60 if you’re really stubborn). Most likely though if you don’t believe you have a purpose, then you probably won’t believe what I’m saying anyway, but even so, what’s the risk of investing an hour just in case?

Here’s a story about Bruce Lee which sets the stage for this little exercise. A master martial artist asked Bruce to teach him everything Bruce knew about martial arts. Bruce held up two cups, both filled with liquid. “The first cup,” said Bruce, “represents all of your knowledge about martial arts. The second cup represents all of my knowledge about martial arts. If you want to fill your cup with my knowledge, you must first empty your cup of your knowledge.”

If you want to discover your true purpose in life, you must first empty your mind of all the false purposes you’ve been taught (including the idea that you may have no purpose at all).

So how to discover your purpose in life? While there are many ways to do this, some of them fairly involved, here is one of the simplest that anyone can do. The more open you are to this process, and the more you expect it to work, the faster it will work for you. But not being open to it or having doubts about it or thinking it’s an entirely idiotic and meaningless waste of time won’t prevent it from working as long as you stick with it — again, it will just take longer to converge.

Here’s what to do: (more…)

3 Simple Steps to Making Money From Any Passion

Is it possible to have your passion also be your core source of income? We seem to hear more and more stories of people reaching the promised land, but is it really possible for the everyday person? Or are those ‘lucky few’ just that— lucky?

3 Simple Steps to Making Money From Any Passion

After years of research I have good news for you…

I bet you there’s something you love doing that someone else would be happy to pay you for right this second. I might go as far as saying I’m sure of it.

But let’s start with a question.

Why is it that the people who succeed once, seem to have similar successes on future endeavors? Whether it’s fitness, entrepreneurship, career, relationships, you name it. (more…)